Let's Help Replace the Victims of The X Factor Bloodbath

Grantland - The news of last night's The X Factor massacre arrived first as a crimson trickle from a shaving cut, but finished in a blood gusher of horror that would make the Overlook Hotel's elevator blush from inadequacy. First, host Steve Jones, upon closing his medicine cabinet after retrieving a tube of Crest Ultra Brite, met the stoic reflection of Factor impresario/assassin Simon Cowell, who dispassionately drew a straight razor across the Welsh mannequin's throat. "You'll never be Seacrest, I know that now," he whispered in Jones' ear as the erstwhile emcee burbled his last, futile apology.

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alycakes1727d ago

Well, I believe Simon already said he wants Myria Carey but whether he gets her or not is a different story. My choices might be one of his winners from American Idol that knows their stuff. Then I would go with a grown man that is a tough Country singer star and not a cry baby for the other one.

As for replacing the announcer....I have no clue but someone that knows how to control the time issue.