The plot is a bunch of incidental gobbledygook designed to facilitate as much CGI action and brotherly bickering as possible. We start with a prologue setting the stage for a Dark Elf (Christopher Eccleston unrecognizable under prosthetics) who has beef with those Asgard folks and wants to plunge the universe into all-consuming darkness. To do so, he needs a weapon called The Aether and a special time to attack when all the realms of the universe align. Guess what time in the space charts this movie takes place? Back on Earth, Natalie Portman’s Thor-loving astrophysicist is struggling to date London dudes who aren’t Norse gods, semi-working with her intern Kat Dennings (who now has her own intern because that’s HILARIOUS), and listening to her scientist crazy boss Stellan Skarsgard babble about planets aligning.